April 1st, 2011. Cure the C.R.A.P.S. with Cigar Picker
As cigar smokers begin to amass more and more cigars in their humidors, they begin to develop the C.R.A.P.S. This is a devastating problem that affects their cigar… movements. Do you have the C.R.A.P.S.? Let's find out…
Here's the scenario: you crack open your favorite humidor to select the next cigar to smoke. Five or more minutes may pass while you sift through your cigars. You occasionally hold one to your nose for a whiff and then gingerly place it back into the humidor only to do the same with another cigar a minute later. If this is a regular feature of your experience, you are suffering from what we have now diagnosed as Cigar Retentive Analysis Paralysis Syndrome (or C.R.A.P.S.)
A person with the C.R.A.P.S. simply cannot decide which cigar he is going to smoke next! In fact, it has now been scientifically proven that the probability of a cigar smoker suffering from C.R.A.P.S. is directly proportional to several factors involving both the size and variety of their cigar collection. We won't bore you with all of the scientific studies, charts and formulas developed by Team Stogie Rate to determine such probabilities. Suffice it say, we have discovered that a key variable in our formulas is the square root of the sum of total inventory and the product of total number of cigar brands and total number of humidors over the average ring gauge of cigars, added to your ratio of maduro to natural wrapper cigars. This is absolutely true!
Fortunately, you don't need to worry. We have developed a solution for those suffering from C.R.A.P.S. Using a proprietary algorithm that analyzes your personal cigar collection, we can automatically choose the right cigar for you.
To cure the C.R.A.P.S. simply access the Pick My Cigar feature on Stogie Rate Online. Visit your Humidor page and click the link. You never have to think twice again about which cigar you're going to smoke next!
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